Fickle mindedness

Fickle minded? Yes, I know that this word describes me well. Before those encouraging words that I got from my friends, I really disliked blogging so much ever since I encountered those anonymous attacks. Yes, and that is before those words of advice came in. I want to make it clear that I really appreciate what you guys have said. It’s like this invisible hand that suddenly pulls me out of this gloominess that I’ve been having. And maybe some of us have no idea how a simple word of encouragement or even a thank you have an impact on others. But in the reality, it does matter. A simple act of kindness is just what it takes to make this world a better place to live in. And no. I’m not preaching nor am I a saint. I’m just speaking out of experience. My dad even said that by blogging, you are actually revealing your personal stuff to outsiders and that is like inviting trouble at times. And I believe that. But I shall be responsible for my own decisions. Whatever happens, let it be. Avoiding the source of the problem is not the way of solving it.

So, do you have any idea what I’m about to say? Yes! I’ll be blogging again. Some of you said that you enjoyed reading what I write. Thanks. That’s encouraging. Yeah, and I’m also sure that some think that it’s boring. Never mind. Whatever it is, you guys are still free to comment. This includes the anonymous attacker. I’ll not be filled up with rage anymore. I’ve learnt how to let go and stay positive.

I’ve been reading a lot of articles in the Internet for the past few days. And you know what I google-ed? Well stuff like, “Why people hate their lives”, “Why people cyber bully” and also “Why people…” yada yada. And yeah, there are a lot of stories that made me think. Some of them tell us how they stood up again, each time they fall when they are met with troubles. It may not take a short time. But God has His ways of helping us. I know I’m not anything like a devoted Christian, but reading these articles has really made me seen what He is able to do for us. That is why, as I have said, this is really an eye-opening experience for me. I mean it. If I have not met with this attacker, I would not have realized that no matter how hard we try, we are still subject to criticisms. I wouldn’t have realized how a word of encouragement is so important. I would not have realized how to forgive and forget. I would not have also realized how dangerous it is when rage has taken control of our minds. And most importantly, I wouldn’t have realized that religion and God means a lot in my life. I finally understand why Sha is so passionate about going to CF or church on every Sunday while I, as my usual lazy self, would either sleep till late afternoon or go out to anywhere else but the church in the past. Now I know. Yeah… I know some of you are already feeling sleepy with my sudden burst of “preaching” by now. Well, you are still reading until this line? Kudos then! Hehe

Anyway, results for SAM will be out in another 4 hours! Wish me luck!